A break up after a long relationship can be one of the most painful and heartbreaking things a person can endure in life. And the traumatic situation can easily become even more complicated in case one of the partners – and sometimes even both of them – has to move out as a result of the separation.
Moving out after a breakup is a complicated matter even if the emotional side of the upheaval could somehow be taken out of the equation. Oftentimes, there will be numerous serious issues to be resolved between the two partners – dividing up the shared belongings, deciding on the custody of the children (if applicable), and organizing the house move itself.
Moving out after a long relationship can prove to be the ultimate test for everyone even when the breakup has been accepted by both adults as the logical end of an extended stint together.
These 5 tips for moving out after a long relationship will help alleviate the problematic situation and assist in finding the best way to move out after a breakup or a divorce.
1. Act decisively when the relationship is broken beyond repair
The end of a long relationship means that either you or your partner will have to move out of the place where you’ve lived together until that moment. And if the person who’s about to move out is you, then your top-priority task should be to organize the move as soon as possible.
Taking into account the specifics of your particular case, you might want to speed up the relocation process after it’s become absolutely clear that the relationship with your partner has ended and there’s no way to fix it. In some cases, delaying the move is a bad idea because it is likely to only create more dramatic scenes – domestic drama that can be easily avoided through an emergency move.
One way to move out after a breakup is to do it discreetly so that your ex doesn’t learn of your intention until after the move is already a fact. A stealth move may be necessary when you just know that the person you’ve broken up with is likely to make a scene while you’re moving out of the place. And if the move is local, then that’s even better – you should be able to move a few boxes at a time so that nobody notices anything.
The other way to move out after a relationship breakup is to do it quickly in a single attempt. That clean-break type of relocation is only possible with the help of professional movers who will pack up and move your belongings in one go. Usually, this is the best relocation option when you’re moving far, far away to another part of the country.
No matter which option to move out you pick, make sure you act quickly and decisively in an attempt to save your sanity.
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2. Be smart when deciding who gets what
After years and years of living together with your partner, it’s only natural that both of you will have bought many things together. And now that you’ve decided to separate, all those material things (assets) will need to be divided up between the two of you.
You and your partner are supposed to divide your shared possessions evenly. But the process can be complicated and heartbreaking at the same time. Generally speaking, the best piece of advice in such situations is to never get too greedy – just take the things you really love and care about. After all, it won’t make much sense to haul large and heavy pieces of furniture across the country after a tough breakup.
It’s important to note that some household items will have strong sentimental value for both of you and if the relationship has ended with an excess of hard feelings, then dividing those things can become truly agonizing for everyone. The thing is that whenever strong feelings are involved, then sound judgment is often clouded and the term FAIR can mean two different things for you and your ex.
In the case of a dispute over a particular item, then it’s usually better to let your partner have it instead of escalating the issue any further. Of course, it’s definitely a case-by-case matter so it’s hard to generalize, but remember that you’re trying to get a new start so taking too many objects that will keep reminding you of the past is probably not the best idea anyway.
In case of serious disputes over the shared property, you should consider getting legal advice from a lawyer.
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3. Ask friends and family for help
Moving out after a long relationship may well be the hardest thing you’ll have to do in years. The emotional turmoil of having broken up with a person with whom you spent a long time together will surely have its heavy toll on your mind and body.
And during such a challenging period, you will definitely need the strong support of your best friends and your beloved family members. So, be sure to reach out to the people you trust the most and ask them for help whenever you feel like you need it the most.
First of all, your friends and family members can help you with the move itself – that is, assist you with packing your things quickly and maybe even loading them up into your own car or into a rented moving vehicle. Bear in mind that when you’re moving out after a breakup, one of your major goals is likely to be to leave the place as quickly as possible.
Secondly, the people who are closest to you can provide you with invaluable moral support throughout the move. They will be there for you, listening to what you have to share, discussing the whole situation with you, and hopefully – giving you good advice on what you should do next.
And finally, if you’re organizing an emergency move out of the current place but you haven’t yet found where to move to, you can always ask a family member or a good friend to stay with them for a while until you find a place of your own. Ultimately, your friends and family can be your temporary safety net when you’re moving out after a long relationship.
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4. Get legal advice when you have children and/or pets
If you have a child or children with the person you’ve broken up with, then one of the most important things you have to do is to meet up with a lawyer and seek legal counsel with them about the critical issue of who will have custody of the children after you move out.
In such highly unpleasant situations, your top priority should always be the well-being of your children. If the kids are old enough, their wishes will also be taken into account so that the final decision works well for everyone involved.
If you’ve just got out of a bad relationship or even an abusive one, then you must speak with a lawyer right away about the legal custody of your children. In most cases, it’s a very bad idea to just take the kids and move to another part of the country without being legally allowed to do that.
So, do your best to refrain from taking any impulsive decisions or from performing any reckless acts that can complicate matters even more. When unsure what you should do when it comes to moving out with your children, you must be absolutely sure that you’re not breaking the law in any way because doing so could get you to lose custody of your own kids.
Discuss the issue with your ex-partner (if that’s still an option) to decide what’s best for your children. Also, if you own pets together, then it’s only logical that the pet animals should stay with whoever can care better for them after the separation and the subsequent house move.
Remember that rash decisions that have been influenced by powerful negative feelings such as hate, anger, or revenge will always lead to even more pain and devastation.
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5. Hire trustworthy movers
During a traumatic experience such as a relationship breakup, one of the best things you can do is to be around people you can trust. Your friends and family should be there for you, assisting you in any way they can. However, their support may not be enough when it comes to the move itself.
If circumstances force you to move out in a hurry, then organizing a successful emergency move can only be possible with the help of professional movers who have been trained specifically to work efficiently. In reality, non-professionals could never work as fast and safely as the pros simply because they don’t have the required experience and know-how.
On the other hand, if you’ve made up your mind to move out discreetly (so that your partner doesn’t know you’re gone until it’s too late), then, once more, you’re going to have to use professional moving services to get the job done the way you want. Bear in mind that a secret move is only possible through perfect coordination and maximum efficiency that only experienced movers can offer.
Your best option when moving out after a breakup? Hire top-rated movers you can trust to be able to move out without any problems or additional drama.
Get free quotes from licensed, reputable, and experienced movers that will help you out during the tough situation you currently find yourself in.
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